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If, Tuesday night, he does collect the proper cut-arse he’s booked for himself, I’ve written this concession speech for Donald Trump, true to his style and character.
IF YOU WANT a visual illustration of the Trinidadian term, “monkey pants”, meaning a really bad situation, drive up to Fort George and have a look at the Gulf of Paria, which may very soon become the Gulf of Petroleum.
IT HAPPENS every time my neighbour’s riding lawnmower breaks down: the mini-savannah across the road, three empty, unfenced half-acre plots, which my neighbour normally keeps clean cut, bursts into a small jungle.